I thought I would reproduce another post that I have written for a friend a long time ago. Since he is back irritating me again.
Mr Icepickles was a lonely and rebellious middle age man that was hard to please. Doing business with him was a displeasure and he often shot himself in the foot. A round of drinks would always begin the negotiations but Mr Icepickles hated drinking. He hated life. Mr Icepickles was indeed a close associate of mine and our business deals were often overrided by pleasure.
We fell out and now I present my side of the story. Mr Icepickles was indeed strange. I have never met a more brooding and depressed man like him and although he knows that people are pissed off with him, he continues to be an idiot that vehemently criticize everyone that is in his path. He does not understand the intricacies of human nature.
To put things into perspective, you get someone who is stuck in a mire. A stubborn individual who is unwilling to change his way of life, seeking instead to fall victim to it. He continues to be myopic and wallow in his own self pity, often refusing to progress beyond his deluded self. Choosing instead to make society conform to him rather than the opposite.
Of course, that is never possible. Thus he ends up as an individual that constantly seek displacement. He turns to different societies and groups just to seek assurance and acceptance. He has told me that he originated from Singapore. But he ended up in the USA. Unable to conform, he constantly uprooted himself and shifted to far flung areas like Poland and Ethiopia. By and large, he has travelled across various continents and this movement reflects on the desperation for an environment that can contain his non-conformist ideals. He is a sort of a 'free spirit' in the negative sense that is bounded by a liberal vision. However, a new environment would always be an ephemeral spark that flames out upon the revealation of his true character. This agains points back to his need for a sense of displacement.
Mr Icepickles is a vulnerable individual and is reminiscent of Hardy's character Sue Bridehead in the novel 'Jude the Obscure'. He has a tough exterior trapping his delicate inner layer that is prone to constant capriciousness. Mostly, this tough exterior was moulded to protect himself from the fierce critics of this queer behaviour. Unknowingly, this facade was actually a metamorphosis of his delicate inside which is showing frustration to the way of life. This unveils a small hint in him for doing what he believe is right and what is actually right.
His lack of consistency stems from the obvious sense for displacement, inner fractions and his vulnerable self. Unable to sustain this current behaviour, either to a lack of willpower or the overwhelming need to conform, he is thrown into confusion that further rub salt to his inconsistency.
It is never possible to discern if Mr Icepickles way of life is right or wrong. If he chooses to lead this life, he ought to show a sense of consistency. Yet he is unable to sustain it and in this, he is unable to seek a validation for this non conformist attitude. It may be probably down to the lack of similar minded individuals that are willing to live the life of his. And this half hearted existence brings him back to the need for some form of social acceptance that is never going to occur if he maintains this behaviour.
Mr Icepickles is a contradictory character of sorts that has clearly lost his direction in life. His complex nature is somehow too convoluted for even his own understanding. His believe to go down the path his heart leads him is not reflective of what his brain actually wants. And that is the need for social acceptance. This leads to a sense of frustration that he cannot be understood by society. If he chooses this normad life, I guess he has to live by his ideals or die by it.