The boredom of holidays have seem to have taken the toll on my 18-year-old brain. And by that I mean that my brain has gone bonkers and is slowly decomposing. Not literally decomposing but slowly degenerating into a toddler's mind. I think I have been influenced by my 2 year old girl cousin. She loves Barney, so this holiday, I have been a yellow Barney. I try to imitate Barney, bring her to look at Barney accessories, follow her to watch Barney programmes, sing along Barney crap with her and last of all do anything that has Barney in it.
If you do not know what the heck Barney is. Let me tell you that first that you have had a sad childhood. After blaming your low life, let me then inform you that Barney is a stupid purple T-REX that sings crap children songs, teach them basic manners, teach children everything that they should know at their age. This is contrary popular belief that T-REX have people for lunch and dinner.
And this is the reality that I want to inform my cousin. You know whenever she says" Gor Gor! Barney!", I always want to inform her that Barney creates a false impression on impressionable young minds. I want to tell her, look, Barney is not real. You should not get so obsessed with it and T-REX are NOT PURPLE. They are not friendly at all and they will eat you when you grow up. Don't support this crappy industry of liars which trick children into believing that dinosaurs can talk. Of course, any attempts to inform her is met with a blabbering smatter of " Bar....ne...y"
So, I had to undergo the process of watching her squeak in delight when Barney starts crooning " I love you, You love me, we are best friends as friends should be...."( Do I need to continue??)
I have often wondered why are kids being cheated of reality when they are so young yet grow up to realize that T-REX are man-eating dinosaurs, no turtle can fight like Michaelangelo and company and there is no such thing as a big yellow bird that can walk and talk and recite ABC.
Kids are often mislead in believing that animals can walk and talk like them and stay in comfortable homes with fire. I mean, if you feed pizza to a turtle, it would most probably flip over and die. Kids should be exposed to the truth and not misled.
Then again, they may be young and naive where they believe that everything walks and talks english. Maturity will eventually set in and dispel all notions of "I love you" dinosaurs. After all, I was exposed to this when I was young and I am sure almost all of you are. It is just a wonder the grey matter can adjust and eventually discern the fact that all the rubbish we watch as children are make-believe. Ah, the wonders of nature. Happy new year everyone. I need to go off the watch Barney.